TO REST IN PEACE...
...in the end, perhaps that's all we can hope for...

It all started about a week and a half ago. I received a cryptic message in my e-mailbox, saying ownership of my Mom's "Find-a-Grave" page had been transferred to me. Evidently some lady who keeps cemetery records found my e-mail address and the transfer was completed. I wrote her back, asking why she'd done this, and she said that she likes reading bio's of people who've gone before, but thot my Mom's page would be better off with the likes of me. So I went to look at Mom's page, and there was no picture, very little biography information, and I plunged right in, knowing it was going to take a whole lot of work to make it better. I found snapshots of her and put them in My Pictures with a digital camera, as I don't have a scanner. The pictures came out fairly well. And as I was writing the copy for Mom's page, I found myself remembering things I forgot I remembered. But I completed her page, and was told I did a good job by the lady who transferred Mom's page over to me.

It turned out my Dad had a Find-A-Grave page too; it was currently being maintained by the Lady in charge of the Cemetery where both Mom and Dad are located. I wrote her, asking if she would "transfer" ownership of Dad's page to me, and she did, and I attempted to do a good job for him, although I know precious little detail about his younger years. To say that our family was dysfunctional would be a stroke of understatement, but in completing my parents' grave pages, I wanted to bypass those issues. And so I did. Mom and Dad deserved that much from me. Ten Years after their passing, I feel like I've turned a corner. I just wanted to 'do right'.

I used to live in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, and still check the websites of two funeral homes there, and last week, I was scrolling down the listings of the deceased, and all of a sudden I recoiled from the screen in horror; a guitarist I used to be in two bands with, had passed away. How can that be? I'm older than he was. He was one of the nicest people I've ever known; talented, with a gentle sense of humor. He passed away just before the Summer Solstice in June. Upon learning of his death, I was depressed, almost sick for a couple of days. For some reason, in June, I'd decided I wanted to hear some of the tapes our band made. Is there a connection there? I don't know. I do know that he was healthier than I. He was thin; I'm fat. He was a vegetarian; I'm not. He had tons-more guitar talent than I'll ever have. I think of his guitar ability as I fumble my way through my rudimentary chording.

In the late 1970's existed a really intelligent Rock Group whose name was "Crack The Sky". They had no hits, but their music was very complex. John Palumbo, who wrote the group's songs, was really, really crafty. And the music was so limber, so flexible, so endlessly fascinating. On their first album, "Crack The Sky" performed a long, melodramatic song titled "A Sea Epic". The lyrics tell the tale of of a Ship's Crew, trying their best to keep the boat afloat during a violent storm. The Lord decided that he was going to save one the young shipmates. The shipmate beseeched the Lord to Please Save The Captain instead, because the Captain had a wife and kids depending on him. Or, Lord, please save the Admiral, because he's got the mind to Lead, and that the country needs him to keep Leading the Fleet.

In the song, The Lord responded vehemently, saying "Don't try to tell me who to save or kill", saying that it was both the Captain's and Admiral's "Time", but not the young shipmate's. In the song, the Lord said, "I'll take the Captain if it's his time; I'll take the Admiral, too, and you're not cool, I'll take YOU!" The young shipmate said, "You know what's best, but could you also please spare the Cook? By the looks of this ship, I'm gonna starve." The song continues, "well, the ship went down to the bottom of the sea/ and the only ones left were the fat cook and me". Sometimes I think of life and death in that manner; those with more talent and intellect than I seem to be passing away, while I've still "got life". I don't know how God makes his decisions or why things happen the way they do. Mysterious ways, indeed.

http://www.findagrave.com/ is a huge website that's great for historical research, or to honor family and friends that have passed on. It might sound like a morbid site to surf, but it's really interesting. And, Rick, my musical friend, Rest in Peace...