IT'S A HEINZ-57 BIRTHDAY...

   ...WHICH MEANS I AIN'T GETTIN' ANY YOUNGER...

I've listed the true facts before. It's the day that President Lincoln died; it's the day the Titanic Sank, so that means I was the third disaster. It's hard to believe that in three years I'll turn SIXTY. So that it applies to me more accurately, I'll have to change the old hippie phrase accordingly: "don't trust anyone over 70" .There. That should work for a few more years. Aging is a fairly subtle thing; I still see old men and women walking around doing whatever, but I'm now having to realize that, "whoa, I'm one of these people, aren't I?" Any woman who'd be interested in me now would probably have a "fatherly image" that kicks in. And I've often thought, "I don't want to go out with that old bag", but wait a minute here: My Bag is Now Old TOO. (Try not to interpret that last observation too literally...)

A TAXING SITUATION: Earlier this year, I decided to attempt to procrastinate getting my taxes done. Later, I finally decided that I actually was going to procrastinate. (wow! some progress!) After a time, I decided I'd attempt to procrastinate further, so I did put it off for a while. I thot, "well, let's try to set some sort of record for procrastinating". Before I knew it, April first came and went, so I decided to do some Really Serious procrastinating until Today, April 15th. So I took all my financial stuff to a church that serves as a facility for AARP members who are really great at doing their taxes. (They don't procrastinate...) These seniors who had careers in finance, taxes and things of that ilk are sharp cookies indeed. The U.S. gov't supplies them with computers, software, what have you. After all, the more e-files (which they do right on the spot), the less clutter there is in the U.S. mail, making everything more convenient.

YOU CAN'T MAKE IT UP: I just thought of something: The Post Office reports that less and less people are mailing letters, documents, whatever. And the P.O. has had to raise postage rates to cover the deficits they encounter due to less letters in the mail. So the U.S. Government that doles out free tax service, e-filing without postage, is also the Same U.S. Government that, you guessed it, is in part causing the Post Office to generate Less Revenue from not as much user-purchased postage. I guess it really makes sense if you don't think about it. Now, let's examine another issue. People are buying electric cars, which of course, use less gas. The state of Oregon makes a lot of money on fuel taxes. But since those with electric cars use less gas, the state generates less money from gas taxes. So, there's a proposal circling around that everyone's talking about: Those who operate Electric Cars will have to pay a Really High tax rate to make up for the money the state won't be getting from those who operate conventional, gas-burning vehicles. Leon Russell wrote, in one of his songs, "I'm so happy, I'm dying of laughter", and it sure applies here...

FOCUSING ON THE SITUATION: Last month, I went to WAL-MART, where there's an optical franchise inside. I am now seeing the world through dark-colored glasses. Say what you will about Wal-Mart (and most of it is true), this vision franchise examined me, they had a large selection of frames, I wanted glass lenses with photo-gray tinting, it took only a week to get my glasses, and THEY GOT IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME! Last year I tried to get new glasses at a Local Eye Clinic. They grind out lenses themselves instead of sending 'em out, and either the Optician who examined me, or the eyeglass drillers themselves kept getting it wrong. I was re-imbursed $700, the amount I had pre-paid them. And, my Wal-Mart glasses cost $150 LESS than the local eye clinic charged me. That's including eye exams. I really wanna go into that local eye clinic and tell 'em, "Look! Here's what Wal-Mart did, that YOU couldn't do, nyaah, nyaah, nyaah, nee-ner nee-ner, nee-nerrrrr, but I can't see how that would serve any kind of positive situation, so I won't. But the thot crosses my mind every now and then...

IT'S BEEN A HARD DAY'S NIGHT: Every once in a while, Angels Smile down from Heaven, casting beaming rays which permeate my Every Being, or something like that, and today was one of those days. I was rummaging through racks of used albums, and I couldn't believe what I'd found inthe Goodwill Bins....A Copy of  The Beatles'"A Hard Day's Night", the soundtrack thereof. Although the Beatles' U.S. label was Capitol, this album was issued on United Artists records, because the film company wanted the rights to said soundtrack album, as they were afraid they were going to lose money on the Beatles' film of the same name. Well, that didn't happen, not in those early days of Beatlemania. Everyone made money, hand over fist, and I imagine the Boys in the back room of United Artists were really partying hearty.

There are, I believe, only seven Beatles-performed songs total on this album, which is filled out with instrumental versions of other fab tunes. This thing sold like hotcakes. The same album in England featured nothing but Beatles' songs; the songs used in the movie were on side one, while other Beatles songs recorded but not used in the movie, took up side two. The Beatles' U.S. label, Capitol issued some of the same songs on the album "Something New", and regardless of song-duplication, both albums sold heavily. The song, "A Hard Days' Night" was a Capitol Single, but it showed up on the United Artists album, and not on Capitol's album. Sounds like thar was some heavy dealin' going on behind the scenes between the two record companies! Much later on (in the 1980's), Capitol bought the rights to this album and issued it for a few years.



Groovy-Groovy 1968 label!

 In 1964, the original United Artists pressing of the "Hard Day's Night" was issued on a black label, which the company used for the next four years. I guess the times, they were a changing, and of course in 1967 there was the Summer Of Love with along with psychedelia; really groovy (I hardly ever use that word; I find it embarrassing) fashions, whacked-out virtually unreadable posters and wild color combinations in almost everything...and I really believe that United Artists meant for this label design to reflect the changing counterculture. This label was only printed in one year, 1968, and you've gotta admit this label design was a real departure. I like it. It's pretty wild-looking. Anyhow, the copy of this that I found at Goodwill cost me 99 cents; it's in great shape, and could be worth as much as $75 DOLLARS. Oh, heart, be still...

Finally, here's where the Ketchupping begins; a full Ketchup (Catsup?) bottle that dispenses from a remote-control mechanism. Obviously, this can't be done with a glass bottle. 'When you shake a ketchup bottle, first none comes out and then a lot'l", after all. Actually, I prefer Mayo on my burgers, but I can absolutely not eat Onion Rings without ketchup. Actually I try to avoid tomato-based products altogether; the sodium contained in everything from Ketchup to Vegetable use has lots of sodium. But I can mitigate that for if Onion Rings are involved!

In closing, I'm still trying to figure out this new blogging editor, so it's quite possible my posts will be shaky-looking for a while, but the compulsive-obsessive side of me now knows this blog is working again, so I can live with that...although it's not perfect...yet...