The Royal Wedding...
 ...the world can now rest, it's over, it's over, it's over...

It's happened; Prince William whats-his-name has married Princess Kate (who now has the same surname as the Prince's). Come to think of it, I don't know what the Royalty's surname is. Anyone got a clue? Anyway, I've kept my observations of the wedding to a minimum; I'm watching The Learning Channel's re-broadcast of the occasion which took place, what, 12 hours ago now? All the vows that were repeated today are the same vows that Prince Charles & Lady Di took so very long ago, and look how everything turned out. It was just awful, the spectre of Camilla lurking forever in the background until the day of that fateful life-claiming car crash in Paris. 

I tuned in the TLC network about 15 minutes before the tape-delayed wedding vows took place. Held in Westminster Abbey, all of the proceedings so solemn in that vast, cavernous structure that was built back in the stone age, and the energy level was about the same as the last Papal Death in terms of regimentation and solemnity. I hope the poor girl knows what she's getting into. For they are both now under the microscopic eye of the British Press, as they dissect the lives of the Royal Couple for years to come. And the tabloids are already speculating on Poor Kate. "Is she too skinny?" was one such article I saw online just moments ago. The ink isn't even dry on The Wedding Register yet, for crying out loud!

The Royal Cupple.

So who are these grandiose ceremonies, such as today's Royal Marriage, for? I think it comes from an innate desire for human beings to Commemorate Everything. This wedding ceremony could've been held in some anonymous Registrar's office, but oh no, we have to over-inflate all of the juicy details of this overblown event; we have to have something to celebrate, we have to try and lift ourselves out of our dull lives by making this something Much Bigger Than It Deserves To Be, it's a way for us insignificant human beings to try and attain some form of external validation. This ceremony wasn't really About The Royal Couple; it's for everyone else, it's the way the Royal Family continues itself, it's for England's national pride, and now that it's over, British Royalty can resume its existence of being irrelevant to anything else going on in the world. Now we've all gotta find something else to commemorate.

That said, I have best wishes for the Royal Couple. She's pretty, and he's...ah...ummm...almost bald; too bald for such a young guy. Maybe the strain of being born into the Royal Family has taken its toll on his scalp? And I'll stop now, before the Royal Air Force finds out where I'm at and bombs my house. I probably deserve it for what I've posted here...