Wednesday, February 09, 2011

...I think this would grab viewers' attention...
By now, you've all probably seen an Elliot Ness-type figure in your TV screen, hawking Car Insurance. (Mike McGlone is his real name.) In these commercials, he ambles his way to the camera, fixes his glare upon us viewers and spits out, "Is it true that 'Gecko' can really save you 15% on your car insurance?" And then he answers that question with another question, something along the order of, "IS IT REALLY OVER WHEN THE FAT LADY SINGS?" Believe you me, I've heard my share of Fat Lady Singers, mostly in Church, where their warbling reduced my eardrums to something resembling Pink Fiberglass insulation...
Anyone who reads this blog on a semi-regular basis can accurately gauge my reaction to Anything Operatic, and that is, "Blech!" "Gag!" "Run for cover!" "Where's the nearest FALLOUT SHELTER?" A Lady Opera singer, especially the more rotund among them, is basically an Air-Raid Siren with Legs. They may be able to hit the Really High Notes, but with their voices on Maximum Vocal Vibrato, even if they're singing a nice melody, I can't understand what the Heck they're singing about. I've seen Opera Singers on PBS or on the old Variety Shows, so I've been somewhat exposed to a bit of that stuff, wondering mostly, "When will this be over?" So, with computer resources here at my fingertips, I tried in vain to find a way to answer that interrogative, with Yogi Berra's timeless quote inspiring me ever onward..."It Ain't Over 'Til it's Over."
So, having taken all of the above into account, you've had plenty of time to deliberate upon the Gecko Insurance Question Of The Day: "IS IT REALLY OVER WHEN THE FAT LADY SINGS?" Next Picture, Please...



Well, that was certainly terrifying, wasn't it? Let me just say that I tried to find something a bit more sanitized, like an artist's rendering of Carnegie Hall collapsing upon itself. Lacking that, I did what I had to do. Sometimes, folks, Blogging Ain't Pretty.

I think I have finally Lost My was bound to happen sooner or later...


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