HEY, IT'S ALL NUCULER TO ME!
...or, am I justified by reacting like this? Read on...
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I read something that quite astonished me this week. An article in the Noozpaper about NASA running out of Nuclear Fuel for future Space Probes to go to the very ends of the universe...and I learnt that NASA was contemplating turning to RUSSIA to see if they have some Nuclear fuel that we might need for more space probes. I'm not making this up. HOW COULD I? A case where Truth is stranger than fiction. Didn't A Certain Russian Premier say a couple of generations ago that "We Will Bury You"? The "You" being "US"...and now we're turning to them for nuclear fuel? Isn't that kinda like a Wolf baring his throat for another Wolf? 'The times, they ARE a-changin'. I guess if our country is dependent on foreign oil, mostly supplied by countries that can't STAND us, I guess we might as well barter for Nucular Fuel..."Hey, Russia...how 'bout we trade you some Vodka for Nuclear fuel?" That'll hit them where they live! Russians drinking American Vodka. It could happen!
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FIVE TO ONE, BABY...ONE IN FIVE: "No One Here Gets Out Alive"...Those words, written by Jim Morrison (Certainly you remember 'The Doors'?), seem to be summing up The Seattle Mariners this week...they've lost Five Games In A Row, and if they don't win Saturday, well, the Song Will Change to..."Six To One, Baby...One In Six...The Mariners' Troubles just...cannot be fixed..." Over the last few games, the M's hitting is Nonexistent. The Mariners' Pitchers aren't just getting hit, they're getting ANNIHILATED. And while the M's will get out of this latest Road Trip alive, unless they begin turning things around Pretty Doggoned Soon, they'll be paying penance in Baseball Purgatory. Not a fun place to be.
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SOMETHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN: I've belabored the fact that sometimes I inadvertently pick the Wrong Variety of Pepsi-Cola, mainly because all of the labels are startingly similar, dominated by a landscape of Blue; some light blue, some a darker hue, and if you don't Really Pay Close Attention to the bottle you reach for, by the time you get home, you'll find that instead of Good Ol' Regular Pepsi, instead you've bought a bottle of Diet Pepsi, which tastes like Battery Acid, or perhaps Wild Cherry Pepsi, which is actually pretty good.
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And here it is, folks, Pepsi's old formula becomes New Once Again...Pepsi "Throwback". The labels tout that this version of Pepsi is "sweetened with natural sugar". That would be how many tablespoons-full? 27, perhaps? What I'm wondering is, after having drank enough "Regular" Pepsi in my lifetime to fill the reservoir behind Hoover Dam, what was all THAT Pepsi sweetened with? Unnatural sugar? Some perverted, ultra-concentrated, forcibly-extracted syrup made out of corn residue, perhaps? After all, anything that's sweet involves some kind of sugar. PepsiCo, just what have I been drinking all these years?
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Obviously, Pepsi is doing here, probably for profit, what caused the Coca-Cola Company to almost experience sudden disaster 20 years ago, when it came out with a New Variety of Coke (which tasted a lot like Regular Pepsi, by the way). Coke drinkers worldwide protested forcibly, and so Coke began using the Old Formula again, calling it "Classic Coke", only adding to the general confusion. I think "Classic Coke" is now just "Coke", and who knows, maybe Coca-Cola sold off all it's "New Coke" to Pepsi at a Big Loss. Now, that would make sense in a strange sort of way...
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So, which is the "Classic Pepsi"? The "Throwback" version, which probably has never been available in my lifetime, or the "Regular Pepsi" that I've been drinking all along? I previously posted that I've been cutting down on Caffeine, but when I saw This Particular Blue Pepsi Bottle on the shelf, well, I just had to try it, Caffeine or No. So, did I experience a divine Cola revelation as I placed mine lips on the bottle of the Cola Nectar of a bygone age? Or, was I horrified by the taste, spitting out what I'd drank and heaving the bottle in best Brett Favre fashion? Actually, my reaction was somewhere in-between. The verdict? Pepsi's new-old "Throwback" variety tastes a little bit "darker" than the regular old Pepsi, and while it's different, it's not that different. And, I think I actually like the "Regular Old Pepsi" a little more. Maybe it's because the 'Non-Natural Sugar' in Regular Pepsi is about 87 times as sweet as the (allegedly) Natural Sugar found in Pepsi "Throwback"? Guess I'm hooked, huh?
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SOME MORE RECORDS THAT YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT: I did this same thing a while back, and I've received an exuberant and undiluted positive reaction from one of my readers (33% of my readership), so I thot I'd list five more albums below. Not all of them may be available on CD or mp3 or whatever the latest rage in music reproduction is these days, but here goes:
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*PET SOUNDS (The Beach Boys) You won't find any surf music here. It's a complicated, moody album that I didn't like at first. It's melancholy and reflective, and if you're in the right (or wrong) mood, it'll knock ya between yer eyes. It just gets better & better with time. When Brian Wilson sings, "I Just Wasn't Made For These Times", all I can say is, "hey, buddy, I know how ya feel."
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*BEGINNINGS (Allman Bros. Band) This 2LP set contains the first two Allman Brothers Band albums ("Allman Bros. Band" and "Idlewild South"), and showcases the Golden Age of the Allman Bros, with Duane leading the way on slide guitar. The A.B.'s never got better than this. Here, you'll find the original version of "Whipping Post", and a Great Version of "Hoochie Coochie Man" sung by Berry Oakley, the bass player (who, like Duane, is now gigging in Rock & Roll Heaven.)
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*LEVEL HEADED (Sweet) "Sweet?", you say, "that shameless Pop Band?" Yeah, Sweet's most infamous hit was "Little Willy" (ack!)...then Sweet went through a pop-rock phase ("Fox On The Run", etc.) and then through a heavy, hard-rock phase (their "Give Us A Wink" album is ULTRA heavy), but on "Level Headed", they headed straight for the world of Art-rock, with mock symphonies, melodious masterpieces, and the Long Album Version of "Love Is Like Oxygen", which is just grrrreat.
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*STEPPENWOLF THE SECOND (Steppenwolf) This second Steppenwolf album (1968) does it all...it rocks hard, it gets funky, there's a ballad backed with Violins Only (!), and, face it, any album with a lopsided-sounding masterpiece titled "Don't Step On The Grass, Sam" has just got to be great. The real reason I like it, however (in addition to the fact it includes "Magic Carpet Ride"), is the long medley on side two that begins with a whisper, gets into the blues, and finishes at a breakneck speed tempo, CRASH! At the very end is a little one-minute meditative song. I know you'll think I'm crazy, but I liken side two of Steppenwolf to side two of Abbey Road. Bandleader John Kay, in his autobiography, said he didn't think the long medley worked, but I'm here to tell ya that it did! It Did!
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*CAPTAIN BEYOND (Captain Beyond) The drumming on this album will Astonish You. The tightness of the band will Nail You. It, too, is comprised of songs crashing headlong into one another, and if that's not good enough, Rod Evans (Deep Purple's Original Vocalist) lends his unique voice to the proceedings. I've had this LP 30 years, and it still sounds Really Fine. This might be hard to find these days. So good luck. Oh, by the way, Original Pressings of this album featured a little 3-D picture on the cover. Cool, huh?
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I realize this is a lot for one post. Hey, what can I say, everything just kinda seems to unload itself all at once. It's my way of compensating; I'm trying to post at least twice a week which isn't made any easier by the fact that I've been wasting waaay too much time on Facebook!