Getting back on my feet...or trying to...
A case where a mundane activity becomes a high spot...

As any of you who've read this blog over the past couple of weeks has become aware of (mainly because I can be mind-numbingly repetitious), I have been under the weather. Really, I think the person who gave me this cold/deadly affliction/epidemic should be quarantined for the rest of his/her natural days. And quarantined after death, too. Because, the cold I have/had was nasty enough to make the DEAD wretch. I am not kidding, this is among the sickest I've ever been. But you already know that, don't ya? And yer probably thinking, "well, if he WAS sick, what is he now? I can't tell any difference..."

While slodging my way out to the kitchen the other day...('slodging' is a silogism on my part, a cross between 'sloth' and 'trudging'), and going thru the various labors to make coffee and pop a couple pieces of bread into the toaster (nutritional breakfast, huh?), I noticed that I was out of EVERYTHING. No food! The last time I ran out of food, I was basically too sick to even stand for more than a couple of minutes. Too dizzy to drive. All of a sudden, everything was so far away and so unreachable. That was when I had a cab driver deliver a batch of groceries. Cab drivers are heroes, by the way. Unsung heroes. And that batch of groceries lasted me a couple of weeks. Makes me think, if I didn't have to eat, I'd sure save a lot of money...

Well, I've been impatiently awaiting the day I could go back out into society. Hmmm...that sounds like a prisoner's state of mind; well, I was a prisoner...of my own body. Last week, I got into my car, just to see how I'd feel behind the wheel. I backed up about 4 or 5 feet (don't worry, I have a long driveway), and that little bit of 'motion' made me dizzy and queasy...so I pulled forward a little ways, and got out of the car. Nope, not ready to drive yet. Well, this week, I've been feeling better, still a little dizzy, but the weather has been so nice, and I was out of groceries, and sorry, but I didn't want to pay the cabbie another delivery fee, so I got in the car again. I backed it up a little ways, and I still felt a bit dizzy behind the wheel. But this time, I thot, "well, I'll just drive around the block and see how I feel"...

It was almost like learning to drive all over again. I backed up slowly, onto the small county road my driveway empties onto, and began forward momentum around the block. And I found that as long as I gazed straight ahead, I was okay. If I moved my head from side to side, I would get a little dizzy. But I could still use my mirrors, and I could see off to the side a bit, even when facing straight ahead. So I got onto the main road, which can get pretty busy sometimes, but I accelerated up to 35, then to 40 miles an hour, and hey, things were going pretty well. I'd initially thought of stopping at the small market about half a mile from where I live, but I decided to pass that up, and drive the 2 and a half miles into town, and actually go to a SUPERMARKET.

When I got to the store, I had a plan. I was still a little unsure on my feet, but I reasoned that if I could hang on to a grocery cart, I wouldn't lose my balance. And that's what I did. Wow! Me! Grocery shopping! I felt like I'd been just let out on parole. And I'll tell ya, it sure seems like grocery prices have been going up...the only frivolous items I bought were a couple packs of "Red Vines", a cherry licorice that is just so doggone good. Mostly, I bought cans of soup, a few cans of sliced peaches (mmmmm), a couple jugs of milk, a loaf of bread, you know, the usual stuff. And I'd spent almost $100!!!!! Back when I worked at a grocery store when I was in high school, $100 dollars would fill up several grocery carts and take the better part a half-hour to put away.

When I got home, my $100 dollars worth of groceries DID take me half-an-hour to put away, but then again, I'm still kinda wobbly. Like that newborn calf who's kinda shaky until he gets used to walking. So I got the groceries unloaded. The sun was still out, so I decided to go to a little county park near here, where the parking area overlooks the ocean. So I did. I stayed in today, but tomorrow, well, I have to go pick up some prescriptions. Society Beware! I will unleash myself upon you again in just a little while. Don't say I didn't warn ya! I remember, as a kid, when one of my friends told me that it would be easy for me to get a job standing in front of a grocery store making people sick. Lately, just lately, I would have been supremely qualified for such an occupation. I guess the big lesson in all of this, is that the bad times, no matter how bad they are, pass, and life goes on.
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Let me dedicate the following line to everyone who's suffering from a cold right now. This is a little bit of wisdom I picked up a long time ago: "When you're sitting with your honey, and your nose is very runny, she might just think it's funny, but IT'S NOT!" (say it fast a couple of times; you'll get it)