Friday, July 13, 2007

And now, it's time for a...

You've seen 'em on TV, and you've heard 'em on radio. I believe the Federal Communications Commission still requires the broadcast media to air a certain amount of Public Service know, those ultra-dull and oftentimes moronic messages generated by selfless altruistic (or so they'd have U think) Government and State agencies. They're referred to in the broadcast bizz as "PSA's". And they're a necessary evil of Broadcasting. Program directors hate 'em. (Even tho they'll never tell you that on the record.) They're usually extremely redundant and humorless and oftentimes not very intelligently written either. Sometimes, like what appears here.

You've heard 'em, mindless mini-diatribes from The Consumer Fraud Protection Agency or the Government Publishing Clearinghouse in Pueblo, Colorado, or perhaps the American Red Cross or the United States Forest Service or the Federal Commission For The Suppression Of Overbundant Flatulence*** (I think that last agency deals with the Antarctic Hole in the Ozone layer)...well, there are all kinds of 'causes' out there which need to have attention focused upon. And, I've found another such cause. Yep, I've scooped everybody on this one.

Basically, during the course of writing this blog, I have not been an especially charitable individual. After all, I've shamelessly defaced photos, satirized the news, and told outright LIES all in a self-serving campaign to prove to my fellow human beings that I am more than just a big blob of multicellular matter. (So far, in vain.) And, I think that it's now time for me to be selfless. Hence, this blogsite's FIRST Public Service Announcement...

This announcement has been brought to you by the Federal Commission For The Prevention Of Hockey Puck Damage. Send your dollars (or mouth-guards) to your nearest NHL public liasion representative. Only you...can save a tooth. Or several. And...only you...can keep the ice from getting really, really, ugly.

Oh, by the way, the Government agency marked "***" (see above) ain't fer real. Although, the way the feds work, some yuppie mid-level pencil-pushing bureaucrat might have actually (and unknowingly) approved said agency's existence. I suppose we'll never know. One more thing...that photo kinda scares me.


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