Wednesday, March 07, 2007

WOW, I coulda had a V-8!!!
...or, how a purportedly good concoction may be baaad for you...

It really bugs me everytime I see a commercial for V-8 juice. It's supposed to have all kinds of veggie juices in it that are supposed to be really good for you. The latest commercial I've seen shows a guy in a car, going thru the drive-thru; he's ordered a burger with extra bacon on it. The lady at the window hands him the burger, then slaps him on the forehead. A caption comes on the screen: "Wow, you coulda had a V-8!!!" Well, let's examine this scenario under the microscope, okay? First of all, anyone who drinks V-8 HAS to drink it for the benefits, 'cos you sure don't drink it for the TASTE...it basically tastes like rusty rainwater filtered thru someone's smelly sweat socks. But that's not the real issue here...the guy who gets the bacon burger in the commercial shoulda had V-8 instead. But hang on a minute, pod'ner...V-8 has 700 milligrams of SODIUM in an 8-ounce glass...so the V-8 is as bad for you, if not worse, than the gutbomb bacon-cheeseburger, and at least with the burger, you get to bite something that tastes halfway good. How can the corporate heads of the V-8 division of whatever monolithic food company that makes the stuff, sleep at night, knowing that their product, which is advertised as being good for you, can possibly harden your arteries and KILL YOU? I have never figured that out.

Speaking of sodium...Of course, we all know what SPAM is, right? We get it in our in-boxes every day. We delete all of that stuff mercilessly. Unwanted, soliciting e-mails which try to sell you everything from diet pills guaranteed to make you lose weight before you even swallow them, to pills which contain Viagra strong enough to raise the Titanic (!!!). Remember the good ol' days when SPAM was chiefly known as, well, that salty concoction made from parts of animals; parts that we really don't want to know the identity of? I think Spam is partly "pork shoulder". Anyway, the makers of "SPAM", the meat, are thinking about suing those software companies who make deletion programs with the word "Spam" in the name. The meat folks see "SPAM" as a positive thing, not a negative name that the cyberworld uses. So the good name of SPAM (if indeed there can be such a thing) is theoretically getting targeted by the anti-Spam software makers. Only in America, huh? (Aside: if you put a can of SPAM in the fridge, you get the "cold shoulder', ha ha.) Anyway, if you can't call spam "SPAM" anymore, what would you call it? Well, I have a program called "ccleaner", which stands for "CRAP cleaner". So maybe in the future we'll see "crapinator" or "crapblocker"? At least we wouldn't have dumb lawsuits like the SPAM folks may initiate. "Food" and "Crap", after all, are mutually exclusive terms. Although most fast-food operations tend to close that gap just a wee bit...

Politics, schmolitics...Hillary Clinton went to the southern part of the country, trying to indicate to the masses there that she's a soul sister with a white complexion...others think she is trying to steal Barack Obama's thunder...I've heard clips of Hillary, and she just sounds shrill and overbearing. But yet the pundits are questioning Obama's character, because he hasn't yet wanted to become involved in a dogfight with Hillary, who, but for Obama, might just have a straight shot at the Democratic Presidential Nomination. The candidates are circling the wagons. The "village" that Hillary's said it takes to raise a child, might well be composed of Democratic Prezzidential Candidates. Stay 'tooned.

A war veteran's catch-22...A lot of noise is being made over the lousy conditions at Walter Reed Army Hospital in good ol' D.C. It's been said the rooms are deplorable, the treatment is lousy, and that veterans are expected to pay for their own food. Veterans. Who voluntarily went to Iraq, only to have limbs blown off before they returned home. Damaged goods. So how can our country, with virtually no backup for vets, send vets who've come home, to "repeat" assignments in Iraq? A lot of them have been sent to Iraq 2 and three times, and others who are over there have had their deployments extended. Is it any wonder some potential soldiers, all of a sudden, won't go. And they get in trouble for speaking their minds. Just another indication that the federal government doesn't give a damn about morale.

Coasting right along...Here on the Oregon Coast, it's been warm the last couple of days, and since it rains a lot of the time here, you'd best get outside when the sun shines. And that I did. I found a point along the coast; a little narrow point, barely 20 feet across, jutting out into the ocean. And, someone put a bench there. And it's about 70 feet above the ocean. Wow. Nature all around me. Ocean to the south, west, and north of me. And I sat there totally transfixed for over 3 hours yesterday. No one in sight. Total solitude. Nature putting on a show all around me. On many of the benches in the parks along the coast, there are little memorial plaques installed, dedicated to someone who passed away. The bench I sat at had the name of a lady who was only 43 years old, inscribed on a little plaque installed "into" the wood. Maybe she had sat there when she was alive. And the ocean was here long before us, and will be long after we're gone.

The sky is falling! The sky is falling!...I think it's supposed to happen in the year 2038. There's a meteor or asteroid out there...and scientists say it'll come close to earth; so close you can see it pass by. It even has a chance of hitting the planet. It would create one heck of a tsunami, equal to the wall of water that basically drowned Indonesia a few years back. It is hoped that as time goes on, asteroid-zapping technology will be in place in case the thing is headed our way. You know you're having a bad day when an asteroid hits your house. Hmmm...maybe the United States can deflect it just enough so it hits Iraq or Iran. Now, THAT would be interesting! Assuming the human race hasn't already wiped itself out by then. You never know. 2038...by then, I'll be 83...probably check-out time, anyway. Maybe I can go out in a blaze of glory! BAM!!! Me...wiped out by an asteroid.

The boot-Scooter boogie...all of this political stuff just leaves me behind. But I'll analyze this the best I can. Here goes...Scooter Libby, who should be sent to prison just for having a lousy nickname, has been found guilty. Guilty of what, I'm not sure; something he did evidently "outed" a lady who worked for the CIA...she was married to a guy who basically said all kinds of baaad things about the Bush administration. Hmmm...the 'teflon' running mates; Bush and Cheney. And, Bush is secure, because, it would take two years to impeach the guy, and that's all the time he's got left in office. I suppose Prezzident Bush and his henchmen probably think my blog is highly unpatriotic. Okay, I'll take a chance here: PREZZIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH IS A WEENIE!!!....****fizz...zok....$#!^&@....,bzzzzz....ZAP!!!!!!! Whoa...that was a close one...guess I'd better lay low, huh??? Okay, NOW I'm paranoid!!! Good thing I have a fallout shelter here in my blog. I guess I'd better defrag; I probably have a federal government "keylogger" in my computer somewhere...

Mortality reveals itself...A good friend of mine, as a matter of fact, my BEST friend, who lives in Rathdrum, Idaho, e-mailed me the other day. He began having seizures around last Christmas; he went to the doctor, and it turns out there is some kind of mass pressing upon his brain, behind the nasal cavity, and that doctors are reluctant to do surgery on it because it's located in such a crucial place. So he's taking medicine and having periodic MRI's done. He can't even drive to work; fortunately, he has friends who give him rides. My best friend. Someone who helped me get through high school's tough times. My own sister is going thru a heavy period of depression these days, as well. I've sent her money for medical bills. She's tried suicide; she's been to several psychologists, and for the last 5 years, she's been through a mental hell. In both cases, there isn't anything I can do to make it better. Except pray. Which I did the other day, when I was sitting at that beautiful location on the coast.
____________________

I just kinda pulled things outta thin air for this post. I was gonna search thru newspapers for something to write about, but I just got lazy. So, here, I posted things which have burned and festered inside of me. And things of beauty which I can't forget. Like that spot on the coast which I'll return to when the sun comes out again.

4 Comments:

Blogger Word Tosser said...

We all will say prayers for your friend and your sister. Depression is awful hard to fight...well, you already know that. So prayers for them both.

11:17 PM  
Blogger Dogwalkmusings said...

Ah, I just finished my V-8 and spam lunch and came out to the office to check the blogs. As usual I got a great chuckle from you until the last paragraph. I'm so sorry about your friend and sister. Hopefully nicer weather will at least boost their spirits. If there is anything I can do from this end let me know. That's what friends are for.

12:10 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

I can't stand the taste of V8 either, then again, I won't drink a bloody mary either, I think I have a natural aversion to tomato juice.

9:20 PM  
Blogger little ol' me said...

Cis, thank you...you always seem to weigh in with hope and reassurance. Mari, uhhh...ack...V-8 and Spam for lunch? You've just shortened your life expectancy for who knows how much. And Matt...all I can say is, "no no no no, I don't drink it no more; I got tired of waking up on the floor"

3:18 AM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home