There is no truth to the rumor that...
I WATCH TOO MUCH COURT-TV!

Half the time, I have no idea why I watch Court-TV...I have no police record, I haven't spent ONE SECOND in a jail cell. Why, then, do I feast on all of that channel's prime-time documentaries on escaped criminals, prison life, watching the escapades of psychic Detectives, and subject myself to all of the morbid coroner stuff on "Forensic Files"? There's no way I'd want to be a part of ANY of those situations.

I have no idea why I watch this stuff, but I do. Maybe it's the "Walter Mitty" factor. There's a short-story about a meek little guy titled, "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty". I don't know when it was written, or who wrote it, but then again, did I say I knew everything about literature? No. I rest my case.

Anyway, like Walter Mitty, I live a quiet life and do not go to extremes concerning anything anymore. So, like Walter Mitty, I live vicariously through my own fantasies and the lives that other people lead. That's a theory, anyway. Is it time for me, though, to not watch this stuff anymore? I mean, I've gone too far when I see a nice little picture from some friendly humane society shelter and alter it as follows:


The folks at www.spokesmanreview.com/blogs/hbo probably think I'm a sick puppy for doing this to their photo.

In closing, "meow meow meowrrrrr purrrrr meow meow FFFFFTTTTTTT!!!"